06/10/2017: Day 29

Didn’t write yesterday but I want to make sure I tell you about it. So it appears that I’m constipated. I can’t poop. I guess I am a little bit but then nothing really comes out. I finally called the cancer people to tell them about it. I’m figuring that it’s the estrogen blocking pill that’s making this happen. And sure enough, that is one of the side effects of the pill. So they’ve given me a light laxative: the generic brand of Senokot-S.

Mike wanted to take me to this place in Charlottesville that has free ice cream. He was hoping that ice cream would make me poop all of a sudden. I just started crying because I thought “I don’t want ice cream because that will make me have done something bad and I haven’t done anything bad as far as eating food after all these days.” I didn’t want to do that again. Isn’t it funny though that the thought of eating something good like ice cream got me upset because I didn’t want to break my good eating habits? I thought that was pretty good that I’m at that stage. But I was shocked that breaking it would bring me to tears.

But as of now there still no poop…

06/06/2017: Day 25

Yesterday, the hospital called and there was a cancellation. I was able to go do the evaluation for the aqua therapy early! Woot! Woot! God is good!

This morning, we got up & went to Charlottesville to find a plus size bathing suit. Ugh. Mike was great, as usual, & helped a lot. We started at Kmart which is going out of business. I just got a bottom piece. None of the one-pieces seemed big enough.

Side Note: Toys are 40% off! Got a few for Noah. It was so much fun looking for him. This store has brought in more merchandise than they normally have so it was also a great selection.

We went to JC Penny & some plus-sized store (I forget the name) but the bathing suits were way too expensive. But with trying them on, I realized I cannot wear a one-piece in my condition so I knew I had to go for the two piece. Finally found a good top at Belk.

Next, we went to the therapy session! Since there were stairs, they used a chair lift to get me in the pool. I freaked out going in the water. I finally got calm & the session went great. I felt like “Vickie” was back. I now want to live in water. I’d say my pain level went from a 7 to a 2 while I was in that water. It was terrific!

That being said, leaving the water I was hit with instant pain (level 8/9) instantly. This whole experience makes me realize how much of “me” is gone. Sure, we can say the degenerative bone disease was my genes but we can’t ignore the weight issue. I wish I could warn other people how bad food addiction is.  It was fun at the time but the penalty I’m living right now… well, it just wasn’t worth it.

However, I am thrilled  I got to go in the water and I’m just going to continue to trust God that there is healing in the future for me.

05/20/2017: Day 8

Today was cool! My sister had a car show today for my medical expenses. The turnout was great! She’s a pretty neat sister to do all of that for me.

Grandma’s Weight Journey hit the bump (or temptation) at the end of the show. There were left over Little Debbie cakes and Reese’s products. I was asked first if I wanted them. I said no but then I whined or should I say groaned as I saw the boxes of goodies leaving with other people. Oh wow! I so wanted to eat a few boxes… Not exaggerating… But God was there and I resisted… That’s good, right?

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WEIGHT: 312.3 (315-312.3=2.2 DOWN)

05/19/2017: Day 7

Today’s weight journey took me to being in yearbook’s class as they had food… Pizza Hut pizza, Martin’s BBQ Chips, cookies and worst of all snack mix! Snack mix is probably my favorite thing ever… I was in the same room with this food for 3 long hours because it was exam time. Several people asked to fix me food. Everyone is so nice!

But I kept praying and thanks be to God, I resisted the temptation and didn’t eat anything!!!!!

It was so hard… snack mix…

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WEIGHT: 313.2 (315-313.2=1.8 DOWN)

05/18/2017: Day 6

We went to Mike’s school tonight to a school thing for Mike. And we had to pass by Dairy Queen. We didn’t stop or anything. But I tell you, it hurt my soul; it hurt my head. I just wanted to stop and get a Blizzard. It was pure and simple just a habit then I’m used to being in. When we come out here, we always get something to eat on the way home…

 

and I wanted something to eat…

 

All I knew was that Dairy Queen was there and so I’m suppose to get a Blizzard…

 

…but I really didn’t want anything to eat…

 

My memories just thought I wanted something to eat…

 

So, I cried and prayed I got through it. With God, it was handled!

 

WEIGHT: 314.7 (315-314.7=0.3 DOWN)